Ladies and gentlemen, I'm jumping on the bandwagon

Yeah, I'm late. Checking into Twitter, I find some amount of venom aimed at Ms Julie Burchill.
So I Google her name.
So, we don't like transsexuals today. Or we do, and we don't like them being slagged off.
Sigh. Here *we* go again. Feminists versus the world.
I didn't like Ms Burchill's piece because it is vile. But I also resented being involuntarily lumped in as an uneducated, working class drone that wants nothing more than feminist supremacy.
No, thanks, I'm quite posh and clever and I'd quite like to just get on being me and letting everyone else get on with their lives. Unless they make a lot of noise, steal from me or vote Tory, what they do/are is no concern of mine.
Oh, I'm not linking to the article, it's horrid. Go Google and you too can experience the surreal experience of the Telegraph castigating the Observer for being bigoted.

I am back

Oh dear. I now have the ability to blog again, and I have 8 months worth of inanity to blog.

For the record, the new ability to blog is brought to me by Blogpress, created by Google.

I can even add a photo. Look:




Wow. That was a bit easy. My love for Google is only surpassed by my love for Apple and yes, I do know, and yes, I would.

It remains to be seen if the crazy random new paragraphs appear or if the formatting is as it should be.

Apparently Twitter will automatically be updated with my blogs. How exciting! I may manage to tweet less: I never did get the hang of concise.

So. Here I am. The question now is:

Why did it take me 8 months, and the suggestion of somebody else, to look for a Blogger app?

Well. More to follow. I am quite beside myself with joy.

Zzzz.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

NB That there signature may well be turned off very soon, but I am filled with love for BlogPress just now.

Typing for fun

I have the whole of April to catch up on reading blogwise. That's a lot of blogs, of which I've read a small sample. I don't, obviously, read all blogs, because that wouldn't be possible, and actually I don't read very many, but I do read some and I haven't been and I feel slightly overwhelmed at catching up so I may just shut Blogger and run away.

Then again, I might not.

The joy of having a desk. Did I mention I have my desk and chair back? 15 months of using my laptop (3 different laptops actually, but that's an irrelevant point) on the bed is now over. I can regain feeling in my fingers. I am comfortable. I am In A Chair.

So I'm going to type until I just fall asleep. Bla bla bla.

Or not. I may wait till I'm nearly asleep and go to bed. Which I have to do from my desk. I don't sleep here. I might, but I fear that wouldn't help the sore back. But I could. I have a chair.

My phone has never known a desk before. It has a place to sit, my little charging station which sounds quite organised but consists of a fourblock taped to the side of the desk and a little freebie phone deckshair that the wires for charging (DS and iPhone) can sit on so they don't go AWOL. And I have a mental attack every time I put my phone on my desk because for no reason whatsoever the box is here and so I have to line the phone up exactly on the picture on the outside of the box. Seconds of amusement.

Come back! I have other things to talk about! Ages worth!

I am watching the Apprentice. I have never watched this before on account of despising that sort of thing (mostly) but I decided to. I like it. Get thoroughly obnoxious arrogant twats and make them look stupid. I love seeing Kate look stupid, she does it with such ease. I don't care about the others. They're all donkeys apart from Yasmina. She said "I am so much better than the rest of them" or something to that effect and yes, she is. She is quite correct. Lorraine does appear to have a brain attached, but she is spectacularly ugly and everyone knows ugly people don't win reality tv shows. The blokes are insipid and unremarkable in every way.

And that's all I'm going to say on the matter, perhaps, because everyone else says it so much better. Sadly, not Andrew Collins which is a very sad thing indeed, but such is life.

Twitter: my life now boils down to tweets of 140 characters. (Why is it not Twits and Twitting? If that's rude then why's the whole thing not called Tweeter?). People come across well in tweets, I warm to them. People should speak at all times in comments of 140 characters. I'm not entirely sure how you'd measure it but it would be great. Exams would be so much easier, and shorter. Interviews would be infinitely easier. It's the future. But anyway, it does seem to bring out the best of people, they possibly actually have to think more to abbreviate, but whatever the reason, it works. I adore Stephen Fry now, I never quite took to him previously but he just gets the tweet thing right and says the right words at the right time. I naturally have many ginormous virtual crushes but shhhhh. Them's a secret. I find out about the bits of the world I'm interested in through other people, I can be spectacularly lazy. And for the iPhone users of the world, Tweetie is a great application.

Stuff has happened. Stuff I wanted to rant about. But for now I'm feeling mellow and unranty and I think I shall takes myself off to that bedplace.

Nytol.

In my head today

My eye's still broken. It was all nice and healing and working and stuff, then it just went crap again. It's worrying me a little, it's not the same (bright red, watering and unopenable) it's gone sore and dry and a bit rubbish, ie I can't see very well. So I feel the need to rant. I've forgotten everything else I thought of, so I'll go with Jade...

I have issue with Big Brother et al and the way they put borderline maniacs on TV to laugh at them being manic. That's not on. I watched a couple of series of BB and Jade Goody's was one I watched; she is largely the reason I stopped. She was put on that show to be laughed at, because she is stupid. That's not nice or clever or particularly entertaining. Graham Norton made a joke of keeping her in, which bizarrely made him into her "fan", and she emerged a cult figure. Eh? She didn't have anything to make her that, other than a seemingly continual need to mock her. But on she went, megastatus, and then the Celebrity Big Brother debacle. I didn't actually watch that, could hardly miss it, but if you put someone lacking in certain attributes on TV to laugh at them, can you really be surprised if they behave badly? Is it her fault? Did she need to be public enemy no. 1? What was she doing with all the stuff that happened next?

And now she's dying they seem determined to milk every last drop of ridicule. Maybe she does just want the best for her kids, maybe her boyfriend is romantic enough to give his girlfriend a wedding before she dies. Maybe the media created something here and they could be gracious enough to let it go. You can't blame her, she is what she is and she has been given this status. What is happening now is tragic: a young girl, who has two small children, is dying. That is nothing other than sad, whoever she is, and it is not a media circus. Oh, sorry, it IS a media circus.

I don't understand the love and admiration for people that don't do anything. Beautiful people, talented people, shrewd business people, philanthropic people, inspirational people - there's something to be admired there, but the Jades and Chanelles and Kerrys are just there, not doing anything and being a national joke. And it destroys them. Who benefits there? Comedians maybe. Max Clifford, certainly.

Love and admiration for celebrities generally: I am less than enamoured with Twitter due to the idiots that frequent it. But some people are lovely and their tweets make me smile, so I remain addicted.

Twitterific

To be entirely boring: Twitter and iPhone. Tune out now.

Twitter is amusing me lots. For some reason everyone I asked to join, did. Maybe because I didn't ask everyone-I-know and asked the ones that possibly might be interested in my updates. Just the one missing, who will be returning to normal life tomorrow and will hopefully comply.

Richard Herring joined hours after I suggested he did on his guestbook. This may be complete coincidence, but if it is true, then how marvellous is the internet? To be able to say "hey you, this is great, try it" to someone who has no idea who you are, someone who you'd like to read about, and they do. Not because it's you*, obviously, but because it's a cool thing.

*delusional daydreaming aside

There's all manner of other stalkerworthy people on there and I am reminded of how amusing Chris Addison (the second most attractive man on the planet), Dave Gorman and Stephen Fry (the patron saint of Twitter) actually are. And then I added people I don't actually normally think about, like Phillip Schofield (who's very interesting and I had nothing against him, just didn't think about him) and Jonathan Ross (who I may delete, he's a bit annoying, which is always is, slight error of judgement). Ben Goldacre (new hero) has interesting little snippets.

It's a bit strange, like blogging lite. But it's sort of the opposite of stalking, those who wish to be stalked provide the information so the stalkers can legitimately read it. Which is a little weird really. But hey. Look at me getting all giddy over some celebrity tweeting. They're not ACTUALLY talking to me, I'm just reading it.

Of course there's the lovely thing of updates from friends. Always nice. And more important than the above starry eyed awe would indicate.

Come play. Click the link over there and join the mindlessness. There is no point, that's the point.

Daily iPhone love: I got Tweetie for it. I did. I'm so sad. I paid £1.79 for it, but oh it is nice. And while I was throwing money at Apple, I downloaded Yahtzee Adventures. I love Yahtzee. I actually wore out the section of the screen on my Palm where the "roll again" button was (this is why you want a screen that functions like the iPhone or G1, not like the B****b***y or any other W****** mobile device). It's ace. I could play Yahtzee forever and this has a bizarro adventure mode. Best game ever (that doesn't feature Mario).

Gratuitous picture of Chris Addison:

NB Still reading Bye Bye Balham by Richard Herring. It's great. Buy it from here . While you're at it, buy this from Amazon, it's fabulous.

Twitter while you work

I'm giving this Twitter thing a go. Almost a year ago, I was asked to join Twitter, which I did, and thought "it doesn't do anything".

However, someone whose opinion is worthy on account of their non-fluffiness has convinced me to give it a go. Or to be precise, she suggested that those who don't get Twitter are dorks. I don't want to be a dork!!

In answer to the question, "why?" I was told: "it's like chatting to the whole world".

Well. That's enough for me. I like chatting, it doesn't need to be at anyone specific. The fact that I don't DO anything is neither here nor there, and that I will be likely to put "eating lunch" or "going to Sainsburys" is quite, quite irrelevant.

Oooh. Synchronicity. Type into Twitter, update here (see right) and Facebook as if by magic. Supreme laziness. Huzzah. Button on home screen, off we go. New addiction ahoy. Ooh, hello, I can put a button to ANY website on my home screen (on the phone)? I can? Oh, that's so much better than bookmarks, I LIKE buttons. Ooh. Ooh.

Right. Now I need to see who I can stalk, no, follow...