News?

Ok, it's getting pretty winter-y here. Where oh where is my flu pandemic warning? Surely somewhere a bird died and we could freak out about it? Or maybe some old people died relatively soon after some other old people dying?

And have all the terrorists given up? Don't we care about them any more? Are they just sitting back and watching us cock up all by ourselves?

I get the news mostly by osmosis, I don't actively seek out news, but it seeps in anyway. At present there seems to be two things happening:

1) The global financial crisis
2) Sarah Palin exists

The first of these, I'm bored of it, ok. I have no idea in the slightest what the figures mean when they say the FTSE is down 180 points. Up means things are selling for more and down means things are selling for less, yes? No? Got it wrong? Ask Google...

Never google "FTSE index". I asked Wiki. My brain hurts now.

Obviously they don't want you to understand, they want you to be baffled and in awe of the clever people who tell you what's happening. Even Evan Davis doesn't understand it any more. Well, I think that's what he's saying here.

And having confused the hell out of everyone, now they're almost mentioning the R word. Well, there's a shocker. The banks all go tits up and it results in a recession. Who'd have thought that? It's going to happen, surmising and doom mongering isn't going to change it. Up one day - woo! all over! lets buy another house!, then down the next - we're all going to be begging on the streets by next Christmas!

And on other news: Sarah Palin's an astonishingly punchable person. Every single time I hear what she thinks, I cringe. Every single time I see the headline "Palin Campaign" I wonder what Michael's doing. I can't wait for Obama to win and in the hopefully unlikely event that he doesn't, I am never turning the television on again. I don't want to know what happens next.

Amidst wanting to throw things generally at Mr Hislop, 2 mins 40 seconds in is the most vomit inducing TV moment for a long time: