A view to a drive

Hawick: meh.
(For foreigners, idiots and Englishmen: pronounced "Hoick")

Car: magnifico!

Rain sensitive wipers: probably the most exciting thing I have ever had ever, ever. I clapped
them the first few times. That's true. And I wasn't driving at the time. It infuriatingly didn't rain today, but the relentless sunshine melted enough snow - I know!!! Getting away from the sea results in astonishing climate changes - to cause puddles on the way home. Whoooosh goes the water off the tyres of the inevitable 4x4s. Wipe go the wipers, wipingly and automatically. Clap clap bounces the mad woman in the passenger seat.

Yes, because of course it didn't work when I was driving. But that did leave me free to clap, so that was good really.

Oh, and next time there's freakishly bad snow, don't drive on the A7. One would guess that in times of freakishly bad snow, you don't drive on the A7 unless you have to, ie you probably live thereabouts and know it well. So the stretch of about 1.5 miles with about 5 cars clearly skidded off the road and abandoned in a snowdrift, plus the one wrapped round a telegraph pole, didn't inspire confidence.

So, remember, bad snow: no A7. If you live in Galashiels/Selkirk/similar then stay at home. If you live in Hawick, sorry about that, but don't try and escape in freakish snow. I'd add "by car" but that would be unnecessary. There is no other way out other than the annual bus.

Yeah. Central Scotland is the height of sophistication. I know this. I am vastly superior even if their houses are much prettier. We have broadband. Huh.

Did I mention my car is brilliant?

"Road test":

The brakes work properly. The driver's window goes up and down smoothly. It glides over the road confidently and is only a little sluggish on steep inclines. The rest of the time it is responsive and good to drive. I like driving Vauxhalls so I am an unreliable witness, but it's jolly nice and new and shiny and gadgety and it does what you ask it without wheezing or bits falling off. Gearbox sound, suspension effective but without making the ride too dull, rain sensitive wipers amazing, very shiny.

I can't do it properly. It's new, obviously I like it; it's not a deathtrap and it's my 3rd Vauxhall so it does what I expect. It was also v cheap and the salesman put a silk sheet over it so as to unwrap it. (I fear there may have been more clapping, and at least some squealing. I don't usually clap or squeal). Which was quite wonderful and I do <3 him for that.

Grumpypants likes it, a lot, and not just because of the wipers. He has more discerning taste than I, despite driving a Fiat 500. Which is cool. We are the family that sense/taste/untold riches forgot.

Ooooh, I nearly forgot. The indicators are fabuloso, but odd. The lever returns to the start position and the cancel is automatic, but you don't think it's going to cancel and start wildly indicating the wrong way. But, once you adjust the steering wheel up so you can see the whole dashboard, and get the hang of it (took me 10 mins, so far has taken grumpypants in excess of 2 hours as he's not got it yet. I don't think. He never took back the rude names he called it) it's rather cool. A swift flick and it does the rest. Atta car.

I don't care if swift flick sounds rude. Go away.

Yeah. Purpose. Hawick will be route of choice if weather good and departure time isn't delayed.

C'est moi moi. Encore une fois. Mais maintenant, c'est tout.