Fots for today

The title of Jonathan Ross' new book, "Why Do I Say These Things?", makes me smile. I checked to see if it had been published a while ago and been wheeled out to capitalise on the furore, but it was just published a couple of weeks ago. 9 days prior to "that" broadcast in fact, a possible unfortunate choice for the title, or maybe sales will rocket if people think a book can actually be published instanteously and it will be all about the aforementioned furore. People are that stupid, lucky they can't actually read so they won't know they've got the wrong thing. Ho hum.

Unlike Russell Brand's new book though, published the same day incidentally, but NOT on display in every single shop in the whole of Britain (Kirkcaldy being a representative sample), I don't feel like I'd want to read it. A sincere apology goes a very long way. NOTHING to do with the way he looks, nuh uh. I did actually quite enjoy "My Booky Wook", it was a good read even though he wasn't very likeable in it. That, I got given for Christmas last year on account of the way he looks and possible mentions of said fact. Nice cover.

Fawlty Towers has been my ringtone for several years, now it's too topical and it needs to be interrupted periodically with a disclaimer that I didn't just install it. I need a new ringtone. I've only ever had 3: The Professionals, which was ace as a midi file, but as phones improved, it sounded worse and worse, then Blackadder which was good till a colleague said "that's a nice march", then Fawlty Towers (since 2003, dammit, that's the longest time I've remained committed to anything!) which I was infinitely satisfied with, until now. I'm going to have to dust off Dangermouse for the time being, till I think of something else. Luckily I very rarely get calls so it's not an issue, but that's beside the point.

I definitely had other thoughts today. Oh simple thoughts, where have you gone? I'm getting old and I need something to rely on.

Good god. I need help. Help me, help me, I'm drowning in a pool of unformed and entirely inappropriate thoughts.